2.  Never get your hair cut in the midst of an emotional crisis or on the day of a big event.  Haircuts, like guns & new hiking boots, need at least a 5-day waiting/breaking-in period. 'Nuf said.

3. If you're going to do it anyway, you might as well skip over the complaining and just do it cheerfully. This is closely related to your great-great grandmother's saying that has trickled down through the ages: be pretty if you are, be witty if you can, but be cheerful if it kills you.

4. Don't expect mind reading.  As much as it would be lovely for boyfriends, husbands (though I expect you'll have just one), friends, roommates, and work colleagues to have the capacity to read your mind, life is happier when you express your expectations (or even lower them!).  A well-placed "what-I'd-really-love-for-my-birthday" is much better than a disappointment-drowned day, complete with baffled and well-meaning loved ones. Speak up, my dear.

. . .

With the first of my children leaving home in the next few months, I'm writing occasional Liner Notes, bits of advice to my kids concerning my take on how to be a gracious, awesome grown-up-type person (both trivial bits and major advice). Why "liner notes"? Because, back in the day, I pored over the liner notes of my cds, curious to find the story behind the music. That's what I hope this will be: the story behind the music of growing up and setting off on your own. (Or at least a ready-made catalog of how you can avoid making my mistakes.)

Feel free to chime in with your own in the comments, please! 

Photo: sisters in the kitchen (via Duke University Collection, 1980 by William Gedney)