This morning I had a surprise visitor from a Santa impersonating squirrel. I was in the next room and I heard a plop and the fireplace screen door opening. I went in to investigate and IT WAS A SQUIRREL that had come down the chimney. A squirrel, in the house, running around crazily and bumping into windows and jumping on things. Neither of us were very happy about the situation. Here's what I learned:
While I do fancy myself as someone who's good in a crisis, it turns out I do freak out and squeal loudly and talk to myself when there is a wild animal loose in my house.
Emergency pest control services cost $195.
Apparently the "emergency" part does not mean they come quickly.
(two hours later) Opening all the windows, channeling the Three Blind Mice farmer's wife, and shooing it with a broom works just as well, thereby saving us $200.
I feel like that $200 is now mine to spend as I choose.
Louie is not a hunting dog (remember how he's not a watchdog either? When will he earn his keep?).
While he didn't trap or chase the squirrel, Louie was a good wingman, standing in the doorway & preventing the squirrel from running into the rest of the house.
Wild animal stress will drive me to eat all the Trader Joe's peanut brittle 3 hours after I swore off sugar.
The stress of being cooped in a human home drives squirrels to wet their nonexistent pants.
Also, google images even has something fitting the search term "santa squirrel":
. . .
Best of .09: Best rush. Well, I'm inclined to say this squirrel-chasing thing was quite a rush. But I guess I'll have to go with the shock in receiving the Zero to Three fellowship and attending the first retreat. If a rush is measure by adrenaline and heart rate, I'd say mine hit a year-long high when I was presenting my project to that group and the mentors, all eminent leaders in the field & heroes of mine.
Oh, but I reserve the right to change my answer after I take the young women I mentor at church on an adventure at the end of the month: skydiving in a wind tunnel. Gulp.
